We can disagree and still be friend
It is mentioned that ash-Shafi'i - may Allah have mercy on him - debated a scholar over a complex legal issue. They differed and argued for a long time, during which they raised their voices and failed to convince each other. The other scholar's complexion changed and he became angry and felt hurt. When the meeting ended and they decided to leave, al-Shafi'i turned to the scholar, took hold of his hand and said, "Why can't we differ and still be brothers?"
Some scholars of Hadith once sat in the presence of a Caliph. One of the scholars in the gathering narrated a Hadith, and thereupon, another scholar became very surprised and said, "This is not a Hadith! From where did you get it? Are you lying upon the Messenger of Allah Peace be Upon Him ?"
The scholar replied, "To the contrary, this is a well-established Hadith!"
The other scholar said, "No! We have never heard this Hadith nor memorized it!"
In the gathering there was an intelligent vizier. He turned to the scholar and said very gently,"0 Shaykh, have you memorized all of the Hadith of the Prophet Peace Be Upon Him ?"
"No", the scholar replied.
The vizier asked, "So did you memories half of them?"
"Perhaps", the scholar replied.
The vizier replied, "Then consider this Hadith to be from the half you have not memorized!" and that was the end of the problem.
Al-Fudhayl bin 'Ayadh and 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak were two close friends who would never leave each other. They were both modest scholars 'Abdullah bin al-Mubarak decided to go for Jihad and join the garrison troops for guard duty at the frontiers, while al-Fudhayl bin 'Ayadh decided to stay in the Haram to pray and worship Allah.
One day, his heart melted and he began to weep Al -Fudhayl was sitting in the Haram and worshipping Allah. He longed for his friend, Ibn al-Mubarak, and recalled their gatherings in which they would remember Allah. Thus, al-Fudhayl wrote to Ibn al-Mubarak asking him to come to the Haram for worship, remembrance of Allah and recitation of the Qur'an.
When Ibn al-Mubarak read al-Fudhayl's letter, he took a piece of paper and wrote to al-Fudhayl:
"0 you who worships in the vicinity of the Two Holy Mosques! If you but see us, you will realize that you are only jesting in worship. He who brings wetness to his cheek with his tears should know. Our necks become wet with our blood, he who tires his horses without purpose, now that our horses are getting tired in battle.
The scent of perfume is yours, while ours is the glimmer of spears and the stench of dust [in battle]. We were narrated about in the speech of our Prophet, An authentic statement that never lies that the dust that erupts by Allah's horses and which fills the nostrils of a man shall never be combined with the smoke of a raging Fire. This, the Book of Allah speaks to us. Is that the martyr is not dead, and this cannot be denied.
He then said, "From Allah's slaves are those whom Allah has blessed with fasting. They fast like no other people. From them are those blessed with recitation of the Qur'an. From them are those blessed with seeking knowledge. From them are those blessed with Jihad, and from them are those blessed with praying at night. What you are engrossed in is not better than what I am engrossed in. Both of us are involved in something good. This is how gently the dispute ended between the two of them, by simply saying, "Both of us are doing good," and as Allah says, "Your Lord creates what He wills and chooses:'
This was the way of the Companions.
A group of disbelievers got together and rallied to fight the Muslims in Madinah. They came with an army the like of which was never witnessed amongst the Arabs, in terms of numbers and weapons.
In response, the Muslims dug up trenches which were" not able to be crossed in order to enter Madinah. Hence, the disbelieving army was kept behind the trenches. In Madinah, there was a tribe called Banu Quraydhah. They were Jews, lying in wait for the believers. They turned to the disbelievers to help them and began to cause mischief and disorder in Madinah, whilst the Muslims were busy guarding the city at the trenches.
The days passed with great difficulty until Allah sent wind and His hidden army against the disbelievers that tore their army apart. They turned back in failure, dragging their belongings back with them in the darkness of the night.
When the Messenger of Allah Peace Be upon Him woke up the next morning, he departed from the trenches for Madinah. The Muslims put their weapons down and returned home. The Messenger of Alllah Peace Be Upon Him entered his home, put his weapons down and took a bath.
When the time for Dhuhr prayer entered, Jibril came and called the Messenger of Allah Peace Be upon Him from outside his house. The Messenger of Allah Peace Be upon Him instantly stood up in fear. Jibril said to him,
"Have you put down your weapons, 0 Messenger of Allah?"
"Yes", the Prophet replied. Jibril said, "The angels have not yet put down their weapons. I have just come back, having chased them away. We chased them until we reached Hamra al-Asad", meaning, they chased the Quraysh away when they left Madinah for Makkah. The angels were following them and chasing them away from Madinah. Jibreel then said, "Allah has ordered you to head for Banu Quraydhah, for I am heading towards them to shake the earth beneath them:'
The Messenger of Allah Peace Be Upon Him then ordered a man to make an announcement, "Whosoever hears and obeys, let him not pray the 'Asr prayer except in Banu Quraydhah." The men dashed to grab their weapons, they heard and obeyed and went to the dwellings of Banu Quraydhah, but as they were on their way, the time for 'Asr prayer entered upon them. Some of them said, "We will not pray 'Asr except in Banu Quraydhah's dwellings." Others argued, "Rather, we will pray now, for this wasn't what the Prophet meant. He only wanted us to hurry."
They prayed Asr and continued with their journey, while others delayed the prayer until they reached Banu Quraydhah. When this was mentioned to the Prophet Peace Be Upon Him, he did not chastise any of the two groups. The Prophet Peace Be Upon Him then besieged Banu Quraydhah until Allah gave him victory over them. Consider how they used to differ amongst each other as brothers, such that their differences would not lead to discord, argumentation and people turning against each other.
Believe me, if you deal with the people with ease and gentleness, and with an open mind, they will love you and you would thereby enter into their hearts. And before all of this, Allah would love you, for discord is something always negative.